“Working from home can be an amazing experience if it is planned correctly—and an unmitigated disaster if it’s not. More importantly, if handled incorrectly there can be a lot of friction in your home. Why? Because, while your spouse and kids go off to work and school to then come home to their “sanctuary,” you are carefully and thoughtfully converting your sanctuary into a work space for a finite number of hours each day. This is a major psychological challenge.

I have worked from home for more than a decade, so it’s fair to say I have a pretty good idea of what works and what doesn’t; what lines to draw and what lines not to draw to keep you sane and your work time and space respected by your family.”

“As far back as elementary school, I dreamed of going to law school and becoming a lawyer. As far as I knew, none of my school friends was even remotely interested in the law or becoming a lawyer. Years later, after gradu-ating from law school and while working as a young lawyer at a firm on the East Coast of Florida, my best friend since high school called me and, quite unexpectedly, said, “I am thinking of going to law school!” Fast-forward three and half years and my best friend’s law school graduation was scheduled for a Saturday afternoon on the West Coast of Florida. My husband (who is also a lawyer) and I were both working on the East Coast and had made plans, along with my mother, to attend graduation and the after-party at her home.

A few days before the graduation, the head of the firm at which I worked announced that he was planning a Saturday meeting that required the attendance of all attorneys. … Much of the meeting would revolve around pending cases on which I had never worked and which were not part of my caseload.

My heart fell into my feet. The meeting was scheduled on the day of my best friend’s law school graduation and I did not want to miss it.”

“The practice of law is a skill, and like most skills, takes many years and experience to develop excellence. To develop competency in any field of law takes less time and less experience. There is a reason why we attorneys call what we do the “Practice.” The Practice demands keeping at it, day-in and day-out; demands research, inquiry, and seeking answers and solutions from others; requires personal and professional examination; learning from one’s mistakes; and pursuing excellence. We begin our career attending law school where we are taught the intellectual exercises of thinking logically, rationally, and reasonably; understanding legal constructs and concepts, and developing research skills. Law school gives one critical knowledge and exposure. It does not give you competency. For that, you must step out after your degree and begin somewhere to practice law, with the building blocks developed in law school.”

“When I was a child, only three percent of lawyers in the United States were women. Now, in Florida, 38 percent of attorneys are women. And I write this shortly after having been installed as the 70th president of The Florida Bar, and only the sixth woman to serve in this role. Even so, we have a long way to go to achieve pay parity and increase the number of female equity and managing partners.

One of the most important ways that I have helped myself, both personally and professionally, is to seek the advice of mentors.

…

There is a Jewish concept called tikkun olam, which means performing acts of kindness to improve the world. I learned from my mentors early in my career the importance of giving back to society through my involvement in my legal community and the community at large. Presently, I see an opportunity to advance the legal profession for everyone, especially for women.“

“It is important to connect with people. Not only in our personal lives, but also professionally. Establishing connections with our clients, colleagues, and co-workers not only impacts our “bottom line,” it is imperative for deriving joy in our professional lives. And often, the only way to truly connect with another is to open yourself up to them. We must reveal layers of ourselves to build connections. Often those layers are made up of our vulnerabilities. I think of it as ‘exposing our soft underbellies.’

We are all aware of how to build connections in our personal lives: be present and truthful, sharing parts of ourselves that the rest of the world typically doesn’t get to see. But in my legal practice, I found I was able to build trust, credibility, and lasting professional relationships by sharing my personal experiences with my clients. In particular, sharing with them the story of why I went into trust and estate law and my very painful personal story of what happened when my mom passed away.”

“My mother raised me to believe that I could do anything I wanted to do, and so I believed from a very young age that I was capable of accomplishing almost anything I put my mind to. Being raised with this positive outlook made it easier for me to see the silver lining during difficult times and to make the most out of the opportunities that presented themselves, because I was always taught to believe in myself and my abilities. I remember as a child she would read to me at night the story of The Little Engine that Could, filled with the power of positive thought and what you can do if you believe in yourself. In retrospect, that was quite an amazing gift that my mom gave me at a young age. After all, she taught me that if you believe it, you can see it, and if you can visualize it, then you can accomplish most anything.”

“One of the hardest obstacles I had to overcome when I decided to leave my decade-plus career in law was blocking out the negativity and negative thoughts that came from “naysayers.” I define naysayers as the people who will watch what you do with intrigue and interest, wonder how you do (or did) it, but fail to offer a single encouraging word of praise. They will not support you, they will not congratulate you, and they will not approve of your career decisions.

Instead, naysayers will offer words of discouragement to derail you or make you believe that your decision to have your own law firm, leave the practice of law, or take your legal career in a different direction is not the “right choice”—or it is simply “foolish.”

…

Trust me when I implore you to just say “no” to the naysayers. They will not see the vision you see, and it isn’t their responsibility to see it. It’s your responsibility to live that vision and believe in it.”

“Your brain is a fascinating organ. It only weighs three pounds and is uniquely divided into two hemispheres which process information in very distinct ways. My oldest daughter is a left-brained and right-brained person who can just as easily create beautiful sculptures as she can solve difficult calculus problems. Most of us are not wired this way. Many of us lawyers lean to the left. I lean to the left so dramatically, it’s hard to stand up straight. I can barely draw stick figures and visualizing a highly decorated room gives me a headache.

As analytical as lawyers are, you would think the science of saying “no” would be easy. We are taught in law school to consider all sides of the argument and advocate for one or the other. We should easily weigh the pros and cons of “yes” versus “no.” But often we find ourselves saying “yes” when we really want to, and should, say “no.” Why is that?”

“The law is an adversarial system. There are winners and losers. Of course, that means that the legal process can be extremely competitive. It has been my experience that in general, men are more competitive in the legal arena than women. Being a woman almost automatically relegates you to secondary status in a law firm or in the courtroom. Subconsciously, male judges and male attorneys think women lawyers are not as good as male lawyers. Of course, this is not always the dynamic, but unfortunately, it often is. Men talk more, are given more attention, and are given more deference in almost all parts of society. Significant research in many areas of life confirms this to be true.

So, what does this mean for women attorneys?”