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Heather Hubbard

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Lesson 24

Why Saying Yes Means Saying No


“Like many women, I was born and raised a people-pleaser. I wanted to be viewed as a hardworking and helpful team player, and I genuinely wanted to give back and serve others. I also had a deep burning desire to achieve as much as possible. Driven and ambitious, I never wanted to say no to an opportunity that might advance my academic or professional standing.

That means I said “yes” a lot. Looking back, it’s hard to think of any requests or opportunities I turned down during the first decade of my legal career.

As could only be expected, I eventually began to suffer from burnout and exhaustion. When it got bad enough, I sought professional advice from coaches and counselors. During this time of wanting to do more but feeling completely exhausted, I learned an invaluable lesson—that every time I said “yes,” I was also saying “no” to something or someone else.”


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“Just say ‘no’ to the naysayers. They will not see the vision you see, and…It’s your responsibility to live that vision and believe in it.” from Overcoming the Obstacle of Naysayers, by Wendi Weiner


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